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Ruminations for October 7, 2025 | Would have loved to see a deleted scene where Gollum cradles his master’s jaw and plants a huge kiss on his mouth, followed by “YOU BROKE MY HEART, FRODO!” (Mark D. Sabien) I have a hard time deciding which Paul Thomas Anderson movie title would be better for describing my bowel movements: "One Battle After Another" or "There Will Be Blood." (Sib Mandrake) I'm glad they made oat cereal into little Os, because "Cheeriqs" would be hard for kids to pronounce. (Kevin Freels) Whiteboards are robbing kids of the joyous school memory of having to smack chalk-filled erasers together until you choke on the dust. (LD Petterson) I'm not saying I'm jealous of dogs because they can lick themselves, but I have severe muscle cramping right now because I just tried a new trick. (Jill Gallagher) Why is it that only weird uncles talk at length about their urine stream? And how exactly did I become that weird uncle? (Steve Hurd) And a Ruminations classic... Who in their right mind would refinance their home with a mortgage company they heard about from a piece of Spam? Of course I'm referring to unwanted email, and not the canned meat, although that would be pretty stupid, too. (H.G. Maclure)

The Top 5 Little Known U.S. History Facts | A drunken John Hancock had to be physically restrained from "signing" the Declaration of Independence with his butt cheeks. Rhode Island is a mythical place invented by William Randolph Hearst to sell more newspapers. The Statue of Liberty had to be altered because when the French originally gave it to us, she had underarm hair. Betsy Ross's first idea for the US flag was a cartoon Calvin peeing on the Union Jack. "I cannot tell a lie, Father. The Radical Left cut down your cherry tree." A version of this list was first published on October 12, 2001. Writer credits: 5> Sandra Hull, Arlington, VA 4> Mark Niebuhr, Minneapolis, MN 3> Ed Smith, Chattanooga, TN 2? Bill Muse, Seattle, WA 1> Don Swain, Rochester Hills, MI

Top5 for 10/7/25