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Signs Your Relationship Might Be Over | She's wallpapered the bedroom in restraining orders. New pool boy is now coming by twice a week, despite your lack of a pool. Though he agreed with your demand to model it, you still know that lace thong is NOT his. She still screams your name in her sleep, but now she's added violent stabbing motions. During sex, you fantasize about not having sex. Taylor Swift just told you to let yourself out, then grabbed her guitar to write a song. She faked her own death in the conservatory and left a revolver, a dagger, a lead pipe, a rope, a candlestick, and a wrench in your desk drawer. After hours searching in the dark along the side of the road, you finally find your penis.

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Signs Your Relationship Might Be Over | Selected from 46 submissions sent in by 17 contributors. Credits: She's wallpapered the bedroom in restraining orders. (Dave Wesley, Sacramento, CA) New pool boy is now coming by twice a week, despite your lack of a pool. (Bill Muse, Seattle, WA) (Chuck Salerno, Chelmsford, MA) Though he agreed with your demand to model it, you still know that lace thong is NOT his. (Chuck Salerno, Chelmsford, MA) She still screams your name in her sleep, but now she's added violent stabbing motions. (Carl Knorr, Schaumburg, IL) During sex, you fantasize about not having sex. (Elliott Schiff, Allentown, PA) Taylor Swift just told you to let yourself out, then grabbed her guitar to write a song. (Wade Kwon, Birmingham, AL) (Bill Muse, Seattle, WA) (Steve Hurd, Oakland, CA) She faked her own death in the conservatory and left a revolver, a dagger, a lead pipe, a rope, a candlestick, and a wrench in your desk drawer. (Mitch Patterson, Melbourne, FL) (Tim H. Richweis, New Haven, CT) After hours searching in the dark along the side of the road, you finally find your penis. (Nathan C. Sherman, Bellevue, WA)

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Chris White

Sep 20, 2023

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