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The Top 10 Commandments We'd Like to See | Thou shalt return thy grocery cart to the cart corral or suffer my eternal wrath. Thou shalt not take thy friend's last tortilla chip, French fry, or cigarette. Thou shalt not touch thy father's thermostat, lest ye be smited until blue. Thou shalt not wear a Speedo after age 30. Or ever. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife, but thou can definitely subscribe to her OnlyFans. Coffee is for closers! Thou shall never attempt to add any ingredient to anything I am cooking, lest I chop your freakin' your hand off. Thou shalt like big butts and thou shall not lie. Thou shall not at all times keep the mayonnaise separate from the cheesesteak. Thou shalt not worship graven images, except for the cool angular letter "S" we drew in high school—that shit was totally metal.

The Top 10 Commandments We'd Like to See | Selected from 74 submissions sent in by 27 contributors. Thou shalt return thy grocery cart to the cart corral or suffer my eternal wrath. (LD Petterson, College Park, MD) Thou shalt not take thy friend's last tortilla chip, French fry, or cigarette. (Carl Knorr, Schaumburg, IL) Thou shalt not touch thy father's thermostat, lest ye be smited until blue. (Kevin Freels, Sparks, NV) Thou shalt not wear a Speedo after age 30. Or ever. (Jay Shuck, Minneapolis, MN) Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife, but thou can definitely subscribe to her OnlyFans. (Kim Moser, New York, NY) Coffee is for closers! (Brandon Eldridge, Marine, IL) Thou shall never attempt to add any ingredient to anything I am cooking, lest I chop your freakin' your hand off. (Rex Meredith, Chico, CA) Thou shalt like big butts and thou shall not lie. (Jill Gallagher, Seattle, WA) Thou shall not at all times keep the mayonnaise separate from the cheesesteak. (Richard Skora, Columbus, OH) Thou shalt not worship graven images, except for the cool angular letter "S" we drew in high school—that shit was totally metal. (Kim Moser, New York, NY)

Top5 for 7/10/24

Chris White

Jul 10, 2024

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