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Excuses for Missing Thanksgiving With Your Family | Since Cousin Jack died, there's no one left to nearly come to blows with Your promise to show up every year until the Detroit Lions begin winning has finally paid off Terribly allergic to borderline racist drunk uncles Possible hard feelings about collapse of the crypto empire you pitched so hard last time You're juggling indictments in four different states Boycotting Thanksgiving until someone finally explains the difference between sweet potatoes and yams Busy researching Q-Anon so you're prepared for the yearly family deep dive at Christmas Had to walk the picket line with the rest of the... oh, damn! The TSA wouldn't let you bring your emotional support sex worker Since when did they start celebrating Thanksgiving on a Thursday?

Excuses for Missing Thanksgiving With Your Family | Selected from 79 submissions sent in by 29 contributors. Credits: Since Cousin Jack died, there's no one left to nearly come to blows with (Donald Johnson, Cincinnati, OH) Your promise to show up every year until the Detroit Lions begin winning has finally paid off (Dave Wesley, Sacramento, CA) Terribly allergic to borderline racist drunk uncles (Chris Urich, Utica, NY) Possible hard feelings about collapse of the crypto empire you pitched so hard last time (Bill Muse, Seattle, WA) You're juggling indictments in four different states (Slick Sharkey, Clayton, GA) Busy researching Q-Anon so you're prepared for the yearly family deep dive at Christmas (Brandon Eldridge, Marine, IL) Had to walk the picket line with the rest of the... oh, damn! (Dave Wesley, Sacramento, CA) Boycotting Thanksgiving until someone finally explains the difference between sweet potatoes and yams (Slick Sharkey, Clayton, GA) The TSA wouldn't let you bring your emotional support sex worker (Bruce W. Alter, Fairfax Station, VA) Since when did they start celebrating Thanksgiving on a Thursday? (Steve Hurd, Oakland, CA)

Top5 for 11/22/23

Chris White

Nov 22, 2023

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