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The list that satisfies -- with only 3 grams of carbs!
October 9, 2001


The Top 14 Surprise Nobel Prize Winners


    1. The Nobel Prize in Science for Studies in Recombinant DNA -- Michael Jackson

    2. The Nobel Prize in Fiction -- Gary Condit

    3. The Nobel Prize in Asskissing -- Larry King

    4. The Nobel Prize in Journalism -- Matt Drudge (contingent upon the return of *all* incriminating pictures of the award committee)

    5. The Nobel Prize in Ligature -- "Madame X's House of Pain"

    6. The Nobel Prize in Strategeric Economistry -- George W. Bush

    7. The Nobel Prize in Who Gives a Damn -- Mariah Carey

    8. The Nobel Prize in Applied Creative Mathematics -- The United States Supreme Court

    9. The Nobel Piece Prize -- Wilt Chamberlain (posthumous)

    10. The Nobel Prize in Podiatric Oral Insertion -- Bill Maher

    11. The Nobel Prize in Guilt -- Mona Silver Who Never Asked for Anything in Return and Gave Up Her Entire Life for an Ungrateful, Unmarried Daughter Who Refuses to Even Call Sadie Weinstein's Eligible Son Saul Who is Now a Prominent Doctor. A DOCTOR!

    12. The Nobel Prize in Rhyming Medicine -- Dr. Dre

    13. The Nobel High Exhalted Funkalicious Master of Booty -- Jesse Helms

      and the Number 1 Surprise Nobel Prize Winner...

    14. The Nobel Prize in Conspicuous Consumption -- Woo-hoo! All of us Americans get to share this sucker! Group hug!!

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runner up submissions for this list.



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Selected from 76 submissions from 29 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:


  • Mark Weiss, Austin, TX -- 1 (11th #1)
  • Craig Stacey, Romeoville, IL -- 2 Email / Website
  • John Mozena, Grosse Pointe Woods, MI -- 3, 6
  • Ashley Deckard, Houston, TX -- 4
  • Jim Rosenberg, Greensboro, NC -- 5, 12, Topic Email / Hall of Famer
  • Joseph Moore, Concord, CA -- 7 Email
  • Charles Gulledge, Richardson, TX -- 7
  • Allen Lindsey, Cincinnati, OH -- 7
  • Slick Sharkey, Miami, FL -- 8 Hall of Famer
  • J. Hutter, San Francisco, CA -- 9
  • Chuck Smith, Woodbridge, VA -- 10, 13 Email / Hall of Famer
  • Dan Johnson, Champlin, MN -- 11 Website
  • Bruce Ansley, Baltimore, MD -- 14 Email / Hall of Famer
  • Bill Muse, Seattle, WA -- RU list name Email / Hall of Famer
  • Tristan Fabriani, Passaic, NJ -- List moderator, HM list name
  • Chris White, Los Angeles, CA -- List owner/editor Email / Hall of Famer
  • Thomas Dolby, London, England -- Ambience   (explanation)

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