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Joseph Moore Joseph Moore says: Off the top of my large, unnaturally level head, here's where I'm, as they say, at...

It's hard to tell a principled reactionary from a boneheaded pessimist without a program, magnifying glass and surgical forceps. So, for God's sake, don't try. I sure as hell don't. Instead, picture the noble Cape water buffalo wallowing his bad-ass self free of annoying insects in the relatively cool South African mud. Hold that picture. Now, making allowances for you most likely not being a large frightening quadruped, and recognizing the subtle ironic brilliance of comparing the output of my tortured wit to mud soon to be filled with deceased bugs, and, well, there you are! Enjoy! Roll around, and soon, the Tsetse flies of daily life will lie twitching their muddy last while you find all the blessed release that is legally possible this side of Death itself.

OK, maybe not that good. But, c'mon, like you're freakin' Winston Churchill?


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