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May 6, 2008


Boeing's latest airplane, the high-tech
carbon-fiber fuel-efficient 787 Dreamliner,
has been delayed for the third time, making
it over a year late. What's the hold-up?

The Top 16 Boeing Excuses for the 787 Dreamliner Delays

  1. Entire engineering staff is already camped out in line for the new "Star Trek" movie.

  2. There was just barely enough leg room to seat passengers comfortably -- so they're adding more rows.

  3. After several failed attempts, engineers finally scrapped the sunroof idea.

  4. Some joker keeps hiding a Red Sox jersey within the fuselage.

  5. Engineers neglected to factor Earth's gravity into take-off calculations.

  6. Air Bus guys keep tagging them with French graffiti.

  7. Still haven't found a way to "lighten the plane's carbon footprint at 30,000 feet in real time" without sucking a pantless passenger through the seat.

  8. Trouble finding someone who can not only fly the plane, but who didn't have fish for dinner.

  9. Can't find the keys.

  10. Beverage cart redesign necessary, as standard size does not sufficiently block aisles when in use.

  11. Nobody believes you when you tell them gremlins keep popping up on the wing during test flights (William Shatner and John Lithgow only).

  12. Giant wheels keep getting stolen by Escalade owners.

  13. It travels so fast that it time-travels back to its starting point at the gate before anyone notices it's gone. Yeah, that's the ticket.

  14. Two words: sniper fire

  15. Still adjusting bathroom wall footholds to allow for *every* Kama Sutra position.

    and the Number 1 Boeing Excuse for the 787 Dreamliner Delays...

  16. Adding that new "Terrorist Class" has given Marketing fits.

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Selected from 100 submissions from 36 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:

  • Trish Jensen, Reedsville, PA -- 1 (5th #1)
  • Brian Daywalt, Wabash, IN -- 2, 16
  • David Kass, Queens, NY -- 3 Hall of Famer
  • Brad Osberg, Calgary, Canada -- 3
  • Randy Lee, Burke, VA -- 4
  • Bill Muse, Seattle, WA -- 5, 11, Topic Hall of Famer
  • Glenn Marcus, Washington, DC -- 6
  • Matt Moore, Fresno, CA -- 6
  • Richard Skora, Columbus, OH -- 6
  • Sandra Hull, Arlington, VA -- 7 Website / Hall of Famer
  • Marshal Perlman, Irvine, CA -- 8 Website
  • Terry Ramsdell, Ann Arbor, MI -- 9
  • Mark D. Sabien, What Cheer, IA -- 10 Website / Hall of Famer
  • Steve Hurd, Oakland, CA -- 12 Hall of Famer
  • Tom Stoudt, Fort Washington, PA -- 13, 14 Hall of Famer
  • Pam Wylder, Bloomington, IL -- 15
  • Donald Junter, New Haven, CT -- Banner Tag
  • Chris White, Los Angeles, CA -- List owner/editor Hall of Famer
  • Steve Miller, Milwaukee, WI -- Ambience   (explanation)

Top5 Bomb

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