Do not immerse in vodka.
December 1, 1999
~~~ NOTE FROM CHRIS: ~~~
Arnold Schwarzeneggar's new movie, "End of Days",
is about Satan coming to Manhattan to find a wife,
settle down, and start a family.
The Top 14 Signs Satan is Loose in Manhattan
- The murder rate has actually gone *down*.
- Red guy with horns standing outside The Today Show's window with a sign that says, "Katie, I love you!"
- Leona Helmsley turns up pregnant.
- www.gnashingteeth.com just had a $15 Billion IPO.
- Wanton violence... um, no.
That godforsaken odor... ah, scratch that.
The undead walking the streets... er, maybe not.
I give up -- what *are* the signs??
- Proposed new subway "H" line would run up Second Avenue, take a sharp turn, and head into the Earth's molten center.
- David Letterman's studio mysteriously warms up to a balmy 50 degrees.
- Times Square is looking eerily wholesome these days.
(Oops! That's a sign DISNEY is loose in Manhattan.)
- Guys with hooves and horns, engulfed by fire, are out hailing cabs -- and still getting picked up before Danny Glover.
- Cab drivers suddenly speaking in a foreign tongue -- English.
- Apartment rentals in Hell's Kitchen way, WAY up.
- Newest Broadway smash: Beelzebublin'!
- Relieved New Yorkers now have someone they can feel good about voting for in the upcoming Senate race.
and the Number 1 Sign Satan is Loose in Manhattan...
- New total: 666 Starbucks locations!
Check out the Runners Up submissions for this list!
Selected from 121 submissions from 45 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:
- John Gephart IV, Harrisburg, PA -- 1 (Woohoo! 1st #1!) Email / Website
- Ken Shinodo, Bend, OR -- 1 (8th #1)
- Brian Jones, Atlanta, GA -- 2 Email
- Bill Muse, Seattle, WA -- 3, 4, RU list name Email / Hall of Famer
- Steve Hurd, Oakland, CA -- 5 Hall of Famer
- Tim McKemy, Chandler, AZ -- 5 Email
- Mark Schmidt, Amsterdam, Holland -- 5 Email
- Jim Rosenberg, Greensboro, NC -- 6, Topic Email / Website / Hall of Famer
- Jeff Scherer, Brooklyn, NY -- 7, 9 Email
- Paul Schindler, Orinda, CA -- 7 Email / Website
- Lisa Lavoie, Waltham, MA -- 8, 13 Email
- Dave Wesley, Pleasant Hill, CA -- 8 Email / Hall of Famer
- Bo Williams, Huntsville, AL -- 10
- Christopher Troise, New York, NY -- 11 Email
- Peter Bauer, Rochester, NY -- 12
- Ed Smith, Chattanooga, TN -- 13 Hall of Famer
- Chris Gleason, Gaithersburg, MD -- 14
- Laurie Northrup, Clinton, NY -- Banner Tag Website
- Jeff Rabinowitz, Denver, CO -- Honorable Mention list name Email
- Chris White, New York, NY -- List owner/editor Hall of Famer
- Billy Joel, Hicksville, Long Island, NY -- Ambience (explanation)