December 12, 2001
~~~ NOTE FROM CHRIS: ~~~
Rapper Snoop Dogg is in talks with Cadillac to
issue a line of cars called the "Snoop Deville."
The Top 16 Features of the Snoop Caddy
- Genuine Monroe culture shocks
- Transmission reads: "P, N, Back This Thang Up, D"
- That wrap-around sofa you're sitting on? One big subwoofer.
- "If You Can Read This I'm Gonna Put A Cap In Yo Ass" bumper sticker
- Anti-profiling feature: the driver's side tinted window has a white driver painted on it.
- Snow chains? 24-carat gold, G.!
- Built-in Eminem-Hypno-Ray to make any clueless middle-class white dork feel like a real gangsta.
- Dashboard warning light alerts you when you're not getting your props.
- Iz-air condizzioning
- CD storage bin conveniently divided into "Garth Brooks" and "Non-Garth Brooks" sections
- No matter where you are, radio finds "A Prairie Home Companion"
- Spare defense lawyer in the trunk.
- GangStar Weed-Trac system -- gives you the quickest cop-free route to your nearest dealer.
- HoJack recovery system
- Voice turn signals declare, "Out th' way, punk bitch!" "Out th' way, punk bitch!" "Out th' way, punk bitch!"
and the Number 1 Feature of the Snoop Caddy...
- For those long trips: the "Pee-Diddy"
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Selected from 126 submissions from 49 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:
- Kevin Freels, Walnut Creek, CA -- 1 (16th #1) Email / Website
- Bill Muse, Seattle, WA -- 2, RU list name Email / Hall of Famer
- Joseph Moore, Concord, CA -- 2 Email
- Joe Desiderio, New York, NY -- 3
- Andrea Crain, Madison, WI -- 4, 11 Website
- J. Hutter, San Francisco, CA -- 4, 15
- Charles Gulledge, Richardson, TX -- 4
- Slick Sharkey, Miami, FL -- 5 Hall of Famer
- Jason Anderson, Birmingham, AL -- 6, 9 Email
- Dave Juurlink, Toronto, Ontario, Canada -- 7
- John Mozena, Grosse Pointe Woods, MI -- 8
- Patrick Major, Dallas, OR -- 10 Email
- Daniel Weckerly, Limerick, PA -- 11 Email
- Ed Brooksbank, Sacramento, CA -- 12
- Jim Rosenberg, Greensboro, NC -- 13, 16, Topic Email / Hall of Famer
- Kim Moser, New York, NY -- 14 Email
- Tristan Fabriani, Passaic, NJ -- Banner Tag Email
- Sandra Hull, Arlington, VA -- Honorable Mention list name Email / Website
- Chris White, Los Angeles, CA -- List owner/editor Email / Hall of Famer
- William DeVaughn, Washington, DC -- Ambience (explanation)