If it's not TopFive, it's crap.
October 28, 1999
The Top 13 Signs Your Co-worker is About to Go Postal
- New pickup line: "You'd be the hostage I kept till the end."
- Three straight days wearing his "What Would Charles Bronson Do?" T-shirt.
- His new "365 Ways to Go Berserk" desk calendar.
- Your fellow librarian starts running after patrons and stamping their faces with the "date due" stamp.
- Overheard saying to his manager, "Y2K? Not gonna be an issue, dude."
- The company newsletters on his bulletin board have push-pins through everyone's faces.
- His molar grinding is actually causing sparks.
- He suggests replacing "Casual Day" with "Wear a Bull's-eye T-shirt Day."
- Whenever you ask how he's doing, he always says, "Gruntled." Except today.
- After pumping the vending machine full of bullets, he removes all the boxes of JuJuBees, caresses each one, and whispers, "You are all my children."
- He discreetly shows you the staple gun he's converted to fully automatic.
- Right after you click the "Send" button, you hear him mutter, "I swear, the next person who sends me one of those damn Top 5 Lists..."
and the Number 1 Sign Your Co-worker is About to Go Postal...
- He's the only one at work smiling.
Join ClubTop5 and check out the Runners Up submissions for this list!
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Selected from 134 submissions from 49 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:
- Dave Wesley, Pleasant Hill, CA -- 1 (13th #1) Email / Hall of Famer
- Mark Weiss, Austin, TX -- 2
- Ann Rosenfeld, Austin, TX -- 3 (Rookie!)
- Patrick Major, Dallas, OR -- 3 Email
- Peter Bauer, Rochester, NY -- 4
- LeMel Hebert-Williams, San Francisco, CA -- 5 Hall of Famer
- Bill Muse, Seattle, WA -- 5, 13, Honorable Mention list name Email / Hall of Famer
- Jeff Scherer, Brooklyn, NY -- 6 Email
- Kevin Wickart, Normal, IL -- 6 Email
- Martell Stroup, Boston, MA -- 7, 12 Email
- Lisa Lavoie, Waltham, MA -- 8 Email
- Brian Jones, Atlanta, GA -- 9 Email
- Laurie Northrup, Clinton, NY -- 10, Banner Tag Website
- Mark Levine, Los Angeles, CA -- 11 Email
- J. Posner, Johnston, IA -- Topic
- Yoram Puius, Bronx, NY -- Runner Up list name Email
- Bill Muse, Seattle, WA -- List moderator Email / Hall of Famer
- Chris White, New York, NY -- List owner/editor Email / Hall of Famer
- Guns N' Roses, Los Angeles, CA -- Ambience