Little. Yellow. Different.
October 19, 1999
~~~ NOTE FROM CHRIS: ~~~
The World Wrestling Federation, Inc. is expected
to successfully muscle its way into the market
today with its $137 million initial public offering.
The Top 12 Risks of Investing in the WWF
- Strange... your broker seems to know what the price of the stock will be ahead of time.
- No pencil-necked geeks are allowed to invest!
- Prospectus clearly states that gains from the sale of stock are "for entertainment purposes only, and should not be construed as actual profits."
- Selling short in advance of a fixed fight is considered insider trading -- and they're *all* fixed!
- Four words: "Stone Cold" Steve Auditor
- America, undergoing a massive intellectual awakening, is on the verge of leaving pro wrestling behi... sorry, I couldn't finish because I'm laughing so hard. Buy away!
- Falling stock prices means downsizing. And in wrestling, downsizing means midgets.
- The Wall Street Journal finally decides to deliver to Arkansas!
- At stockholder meetings, no one is ever looking when you get hit in the head with a chair.
- You: 98-pound weakling. Your partner for the 3-legged race at the annual stockholders' picnic: Sexual Chocolate
- Austin: -3/16
and the Number 1 Risk of Investing in the WWF...
- Phone call from Vince McMahon next year: "Aaare you rrrready to declare Chaaaaapteeerrrrr Eleeeeeeevvveennnnnnn???!!!!!"
Join ClubTop5 and check out the Runners Up submissions for this list!
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Selected from 112 submissions from 43 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:
- Kevin Wickart, Normal, IL -- 1 (2nd #1) Email
- John Treusch, Burlington, NJ -- 2
- Sandra Hull, Arlington, VA -- 3 Email / Website (Rookie!)
- Chuck Smith, Woodbridge, VA -- 4, 11 Email / Hall of Famer
- Joe DiPietro, Brooklyn, NY -- 4 Email / Website
- Sam Evans, Charleston, SC -- 4 Email / Hall of Famer
- Fred Hesby, Portland, OR -- 4 Email / Website
- David G. Scott, Kansas City, MO -- 4 Email
- Sterling Smith, San Ramon, CA -- 5 Email
- Jeff Scherer, Brooklyn, NY -- 6 Email
- Chris Walker, Calimesa, CA -- 7 (Rookie!)
- Mark Niebuhr, Minneapolis, MN -- 8
- Jonathan D. Colan, Miami, FL -- 9 Email / Hall of Famer
- Rob Wolf, Seattle, WA -- 10 Email
- Scott Sistek, Seattle, WA -- 12 (Rookie!)
- Jim Rosenberg, Greensboro, NC -- Topic Email / Website / Hall of Famer
- Jeffrey Anbinder, Ithaca, NY -- Banner Tag Email / Website
- Alan Smithee, Sugar Land, TX -- Honorable Mention list name Email
- Tristan Fabriani, Passaic, NJ -- Runner Up list name Email
- Chris White, New York, NY -- List owner/editor Email / Hall of Famer
- Cheryl Lynn, Los Angeles, CA -- Ambience