May 16, 2001
The Top 16 Lines You'll Never Hear in a Western
- "As your attorney, I must strongly advise you against participating in that showdown in the middle of town. The liability issues are staggering."
- "Well me, the construction worker, and my sailor buddy are here to tell y'all, it's *fun* to go to the YMCA!"
- "Take it from me, Festus, a good pair o' nylons keeps the chaps from riding up."
- "Barkeep! Three more Slippery Nipples for my posse."
- "Miss Kitty, I don't think I've ever seen stirrups used quite like that before."
- "In this town we got a way to deal with murderin' scum like you, Bart -- civil litigation!"
- "Whose turn is it to change the potpourri in the bunkhouse?"
- "Well, men, the Apaches have burned down our fort and stolen our women... but considering what we've done to THEM, I think they're showing remarkable self-restraint."
- "You had me at 'Howdy.'"
- "Yeah, I'm sure he was an Indian -- his name was Amandip Gupta."
- "That's *Sheriff* Richard Simmons to you, pardner."
- "I cain't go in the saloon! Brown Bart's wearin' the same shirt I'm a-wearin'!"
- "They call me... Moesha."
- "Dadgummit, boys, slow down on that vichyssoise or you ain't gonna have no room for the tiramisu!"
- "Three to five day waiting period? But I got a duel at sundown!"
and the Number 1 Line You'll Never Hear in a Western...
- "reach 4 the sky! :-O put all ur $$$ in the bag, lol."
Join ClubTop5 and check out the Runners Up submissions for this list!
Selected from 167 submissions from 62 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:
- Larry Hollister, Concord, CA -- 1, 9 (39th #1) Email / Website / Hall of Famer
- Danny Gallagher, Austin, TX -- 2 Email (Rookie!)
- Brad Osberg, Calgary, Canada -- 3, 8, 16
- Pat McCarley, Missouri City, TX -- 3
- Michael Sheinbaum, King of Prussia, PA -- 4 Email / Website
- Sue Prifogle Otte, Rushville, IN -- 5 Email
- Joe DiPietro, Brooklyn, NY -- 6 Email / Website
- Dave Wesley, Pleasant Hill, CA -- 7 Email / Hall of Famer
- Kevin Wickart, Normal, IL -- 8 Email / Website
- Dawson Rambo, Santa Rosa, CA -- 8
- Jennifer Ford, Fort Wayne, IN -- 9 Email / Website
- Jeff Scherer, Brooklyn, NY -- 9 Email
- Chuck Smith, Woodbridge, VA -- 10 Email / Hall of Famer
- Mark Niebuhr, Minneapolis, MN -- 11 Website
- Dave Henry, Slidell, LA -- 12 Email
- Bill Muse, Seattle, WA -- 13 Email / Hall of Famer
- Jesse Weiss, Dallas, TX -- 14 Website
- Peter Rogers, Austin, TX -- 15, Topic
- Jim Larsen, Springfield, MO -- Banner tag
- Lev L. Spiro, Los Angeles, CA -- Runner Up list name Email / Hall of Famer
- Michael Whitmire, Houston, TX -- Honorable Mention list name
- Tristan Fabriani, Passaic, NJ -- List moderator
- Chris White, Los Angeles, CA -- List owner/editor Email / Hall of Famer
- 10,000 Maniacs, Jamestown, NY -- Ambience (explanation)