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TopFive.com

Agitating your dots since 1994.
June 12, 2006




~~~ NOTE FROM CHRIS: ~~~

Gentlemen, start your thetans!

The "Church" of Scientology will attempt to
spread its "Ignite Your Potential" message
into auto racing through sponsorship of a
race car in one of NASCAR's lowest levels.


The Top 5 Signs You're a Redneck Scientologist

  1. The only couch your fiancee lets you jump on is the one on the front porch.

  2. Using nothing but mind-power, you compel bass to fly into your boat.

  3. You figure it has to be a legitimate religion if it was founded by a guy with a good ol' down-home country name like Elron Bubba.

  4. Your e-meter consists of two Miller High Life cans tied to a Die Hard battery.

    and the Number 1 Sign You're a Redneck Scientologist...

  5. You're finally able to admit your attraction to John Travolta's purty mouth.





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Selected from 87 submissions from 36 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:


  • Daniel Weckerly, Limerick, PA -- 1 (26th #1) Hall of Famer
  • Gordon Sherman, Camp Slayer, Baghdad -- 2
  • Brad Hamer, Austin, TX -- 3
  • J.J. Gertler, Alexandria, VA -- 4
  • John J. Brassil, Nashville, TN -- 5
  • Kim Moser, New York, NY -- 5 Hall of Famer
  • Jeff Rabinowitz, Wilkes-Barre, PA -- 5
  • Michael Sheinbaum, Exton, PA -- 5 Website
  • Curtis Stoddard, Milwaukie, OR -- 5
  • Ellen Satter, Trumbull, CT -- 5
  • David Zechiel, Lake Forest, CA -- Topic
  • Jeffrey Anbinder, New York, NY -- Banner Tag
  • Chris White, Los Angeles, CA -- List owner/editor Hall of Famer
  • Nine Inch Nails, Cleveland, OH -- Ambience   (explanation)

Top5 Bomb

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