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TopFive.com

We put the "hum" in "humor."
June 1, 2006




The Top 5 Signs Your Local Terrorists Are Inept

  1. They've drawn up an elaborate plan to bomb Wrigley Field during the World Series.

  2. Flew a hang glider into a White Castle because they thought the king lived there.

  3. Their demands include full recognition by the International House of Pancakes.

  4. They were denied a permit for their "Foolish Americans Take-No-Prisoners Death Parade" because they couldn't sell enough al-Qaeda Scout cookies for the fee.

    and the Number 1 Sign Your Local Terrorists Are Inept...

  5. "We have Paris Hilton. Do exactly as we say or you'll never see her again."





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Selected from 121 submissions from 45 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:


  • Marcelo Rinesi, Buenos Aires, Argentina -- 1 (Woohoo! 1st #1!)
  • Dave Goudsward, Lake Worth, FL -- 1 (20th #1)
  • Richard Skora, Columbus, OH -- 1, Banner Tag (7th #1)
  • Daniel Weckerly, Limerick, PA -- 1 (24th #1) Hall of Famer
  • Mark D. Sabien, What Cheer, IA -- 2 Website / Hall of Famer
  • David Kass, Queens, NY -- 3 Hall of Famer
  • Meg Silvern, Tucson, AZ -- 4
  • Fran Fruit, Winnetka, IL -- 5 Hall of Famer
  • Greg Preece, Toronto, Canada -- 5
  • Chris White, Los Angeles, CA -- List owner/editor Hall of Famer
  • Guadalcanal Diary, Marietta, GA -- Ambience   (explanation)

Top5 Bomb

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