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August 10, 2005


Today's list was compiled by new Hall of Fame inductee
Mark D. Sabien. You can learn more than you'd ever care
to know about Mark by visiting his spiffy website.

Brian Jackson of Pittsburgh recently dated two
women by pretending to be Steelers quarterbacks
Ben Roethlisberger and Brian St. Pierre.
Until he got busted, that is.

The Top 5 Signs Your New S.O.
Is Not Really a Celebrity

    1. You knew going in that Kid Rock and Tommy Lee would be a hard act to follow, but the package that makes you feel the most inferior is *Pam's*.

    2. Yeah, like the *real* Pat Sajak is funny enough to have his entries make the TopFive list!

    3. Woody is within forty years of your age, and you don't have any coquettish domestic help running about.

    4. "Hurricane Mary-Kate" just destroyed the buffet line at the Sizzler.

      and the Number 1 Sign Your New S.O. Is Not Really a Celebrity...

    5. True, he's bald, fat and says "D'OH!" all the time, but he looks suspiciously three-dimensional.

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Selected from 89 submissions from 34 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:

  • Yoram Puius, New York, NY -- 1 (21st #1)
  • Colleen Stelmaszek, Houston, TX -- 2
  • Michael Cunningham, Woodridge, IL -- 3
  • Bruce W. Alter, Fairfax Station, VA -- 4
  • Mark D. Sabien, What Cheer, IA -- 5, Topic Website / Hall of Famer
  • Tristan Fabriani, Passaic, NJ -- Banner Tag
  • Chris White, Los Angeles, CA -- List owner/editor Hall of Famer
  • Vanilla Ice, Miami Lakes, FL -- Ambience   (explanation)

Top5 Bomb

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