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TopFive.com
Help! I'm a prisoner in Chris White's basement!
March 25, 2005


The Top 5 Signs Someone
You Know Is on Steroids
(Part I)


    1. Last time Grandma bounced you on her knee, you wound up with a deviated rectum.

    2. Your daughter's basketball skills are nearly as impressive as her new-found ability to pee standing up.

    3. That "Mark McGwire" with 15-1 odds in the third race at Churchill Downs? Not a horse.

    4. Torn between his fear of drowning and his desire for a vacation, Daddy lands a hook in Maui and drags it closer.

      and the Number 1 Sign Someone You Know Is on Steroids...

    5. Given the huge head, volatile mood swings and teeny testicles, he's either juicin' or he's a 6-month-old.



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Selected from 103 submissions from 41 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:


  • Andy Krakowski, Alexandria, VA -- 1 (13th #1)
  • Christa Grunewald, Wamego, KS -- 2
  • John J. Brassil, Nashville, TN -- 3
  • Daniel Weckerly, Limerick, PA -- 4 Hall of Famer
  • Matt Kall, Cleveland Heights, OH -- 5
  • David G. Scott, Kansas City, MO -- Topic Website
  • Elliott Schiff, Allentown, PA -- Banner Tag
  • Chris White, Los Angeles, CA -- List owner/editor Email / Hall of Famer
  • Judy Kay Newton, Lakehurst, NJ -- Ambience   (explanation)

Top5 Bomb

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