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TopFive.com
Designed by women doctors for all-day comfort.
January 15, 1998


The Top 5 Changes Now
That the Baby Has Arrived


    1. Bundle of joy, my ass. Just another ingrate to buy cigarettes for.

    2. Junior looks adorable in his little "sandbox," but the cat is seriously torqued about it.

    3. Mama cuts back to a sixer a day now that she's only "drinkin' fer one."

    4. For efficiency, your paycheck now direct-deposited to Disney.

      and the Number 1 Change Now That the Baby Has Arrived...

    5. The closest you come to orgasm is when you think of sleep.



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Selected from 105 submissions from 38 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors were:


  • Marsha Clodfelter, Corpus Christi, TX -- 1 (4th #1)
  • Bruce Ansley, Baltimore, MD -- 2
  • Caroline Gennity, Virginia Beach, VA -- 3
  • Larry G. Hollister, Concord, CA -- 4
  • Don Swain, Pontiac, MI -- 5
  • Alan Smithee, Sugar Land, TX -- Topic
  • Robert Sullivan, Salem, OR -- Banner Tag
  • Chris White, Los Angeles, CA -- List owner/editor
  • Jellyfish, San Francisco, CA -- Ambience

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